I walk down the street eating my mint ice cream wearing a fedora; a hat I never thought I could pull off, especially while eating an ice cream. I don't feel fat for indulging and I don't feel weird or out of place in this hat meant for girls that don't care about being too trendy or not trendy enough. Today strangers on the street are giving me compliments. Sassy hat. I love your accessories. Is that a Louis Vouttin (borrowed from my bosses closet)? And I realize for the first time that maybe I was never meant to be a girl that counted calories or didn't wear hats or carry bags that I worry make me look pretentious. So I stop at the make-up counter and let the girl paint my lips coral and brighten my lids with yellow. I haven't used an eyeshadow that wasn't in the scheme of beige since the 9th grade. I tried on a different girl today and until I settle into myself I think I'll buy more hats, wear taller shoes and not give a shit if I gain a little weight because there's too much life to live outside shades of beige.
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